Alan Shepard's Blues

*I don't know where the idea for this came from, but I do remember reading about Alan Shepard's Prayer: before taking off, he supposedly said 'Dear Lord: please don't let me fuck this up.' I usually introduce this as being about the two most interesting golf shots in history, perhaps the only two. This was one of the songs I played at Maths City in Leeds.

The weather is perfect, there isn't a breeze
No water hazards, no bunkers, no trees
Just me, a six-iron, a ball on the tee
A flag in the distance, a simple par three:
But this isn't Gleneagles, St Andrews or Troon,
It's the first game of golf on the moon.

Don't try to tell me moon golf is illegal
When Neil and Buzz got here, they landed an Eagle
We'll play a quick round in a basic facility
A primitive links by the Sea of Tranquility
I don't need a clubhouse, a bar, a saloon
For the first game of golf on the moon.

Apparently gravity's minimal here
There's no air resistance in no atmosphere
Cramped up in a spacesuit and swinging one-handed
I've hit it so far, I can't tell where it landed
Hopefully someone will track it down soon
And we'll play some more golf on the moon.

A happy thought strikes as I putt through a crater:
I'm thousands of miles from the nearest spectator
But the radio crackles, it's mission control
Excitedly shouting out "GET IN THE HOLE!"
You guys take off now, just leave me marooned
In peace, playing golf on the moon.